This adorable little girl

I promised to love myself for one month before making any decisions about anything.

Here is the thing - I was able to see who is it who is crying inside me. It was me age 7 or 8 or 9, I recognized my age because at that age my hair was braided - I had a braid on the right and a braid on the left. I saw myself crying because at that age I witnessed a huge argument between my dad and my grandma Schuka. Everyone in the family gathered in the bedroom and those two started arguing. My grandmother was furious (why?) and grabbed my dad's ears and plunged her nails inside his skin breaking it. My dad just pushed her a little aside which resulted in him breaking her arm (she had very brittle bones). As they were arguing, my mother was screaming also and my grandpa was also screaming. I was crying, it traumatized me so much to this day!

I did not realize how much it traumatized me. So in my vision, I went into this room and removed the little me from this madness into the living room. We laid down on the sofa together, and I was holding this little girl who was hugging me. She so much needed love from her mother!! I am not her mother, but all I could do is to hold her to make her feel loved. We stayed like this for 10 minutes, then it was time for me to end this part of meditation and to connect to my G.A. instead. But the little girl just would not let me go, and I could not abandon her. I felt she needed me. As we laid there, I could feel how much love she has for me. She loves me so much! I have allowed myself to let this love into my heart and felt it and it moved me incredibly, I started crying. I have tears in my eyes now still, 2 days after this vision as I think about it. Yesterday I described this to H and could not hold back my tears.

I stayed with this little girl, she was holding me, I was holding her and without letting her go, I connected with my G.A.

I feel these "loving myself" experiences are very good for me.