With H being gone for 2 days and one night, I cannot helpbut feel how much I miss him and how much love I have for him. The love I feel for him is so deep, it is as if it spills out from my heart into my whole body. It fills up my whole body. There is so much love, it hurts. My heart is crying for him - I am starting to feel the tears filling my eyes because my heart is longing for him.
Why can't I see this or feel the love or appreciate him when he is home. When he is at home, even though I love him, many times I feel I want to get away. Sometimes I hate him, i am angry with him. Why can't I appreciate him when he is here with me? How can I start living in a minute and enjoy him when we are together instead of being angry or upset about very stupid things. How can I start enjoying him again?
I did not know I could love someone this much. The prospect of him living overseas and being in a long distance relationship with him again, is really something that makes me very sad. I know how huge our phone bills will be and how much I will long to see him on the weekends.
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