feel sad today. will drop any hopes for a meeting with V. hoping to meet him and talk about the situation is making me upset and i dont feel much is going to resolve after we talk. so feel i need to mail his book to him and that will be it. Not even friends. that is a shame. I liked him so much! but he dropped me as a person and as a friend and that is what hurts me now. Somehow i need to get closure myself and move on.
I know that this is what God wanted and some time from now I will be grateful for this experience but now i am struggling to find the meaning of it. When I asked what his purpose was in my life, I get an answer that he opened my heart (which is true, I really opened up my heart to him) and that allowed me to get pregnant. So something to be grateful for.
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